Sharing a little pet peeve here.
I detest artificial friendliness. This is where Russia really has it all over Americans. In Russia people do not paste false smiles onto their faces, or tell you to "have a nice day" again and again. I suppose you might say they err on the opposite end of the scale, taking even everyday exchanges - in stores or at a business, very seriously. I don't mind that at all, frankly. When the lady responsible for handling the dry-cleaning at the hotel is hyper-solemn and businesslike, it gives her (and her job) dignity. When the girl checking out at the grocery store, reprimands me for not bringing my own bags - well, she is right; I had been in Russia enough to know that I ought to carry a bag or two with me at all times. (And who can't appreciate that thriftiness and environmental benefit?)
Here, though, it is a different story. In the front entry of far too many places there is someone who is actually placed there to watch for shoplifters, I'm told, but quite disingenuously, these people are called "greeters". And greet they do! They greet you with a bright "hello" as though they know you. As though they care about you. As though it delights them to see you. Since none of these things are true, perhaps there is some psychological ploy going on, intended to immediately put customers (oh, sorry - "guests") at a disadvantage. Because, no matter if you are deep in thought, or trying desperately to recall the seven things you want to be sure to buy (ticking them off in your mind so as not to forget), or you might even be so sad you are just struggling to keep from crying - despite whatever it is that is going on with you - enter the store and you must suddenly snap to attention yourself, and be artificially friendly back.
I hate it!
Part of that comes from having lived in a place where the effect that the big box stores are hoping to achieve (I think) was the genuine article. If you live in a small town, where everyone knows - or is, at least, acquainted with - everyone else, then these greetings are legitimate. When we were first married, we lived in a little town in Eastern Oregon - Heppner. Everyone in Heppner at least knew of everyone else.... Even if you didn't really know someone, you were all in the "same boat" so to speak. Living in that rural area gave you immediately a lot in common with everyone else. The town only had 1,500 people and it was an hour drive to anywhere bigger. When people were born, or when people died, a little notice was put on the counter in all the main businesses. People did matter. People were individuals. We had release time for religion classes, and if ever anyone noticed a little Catholic dilly-dallying by the creek rather than heading straight to the church for classes - I'd get a phone call! So, when the checker at the grocery store gave you a greeting it was the genuine article.
Maxim is working at Target now. I was early to pick him up one day, and figured I'd pleasantly wile away the time by browsing. I do enjoy browsing in Target.....but not that day! Every couple of minutes someone would ask me if they could "help" me - or assault me with one of those artificial "Hi! How are you?" non-questions. You can't really enjoy browsing if you have to keep stopping to speak to strangers. I just wonder what they think they are accomplishing. Comparitively, I am friendly and outgoing! I'm pretty comfortable talking to strangers after years of doing theatre and touring from city to city, sometimes even boarding with different people every night. Surely this stuff is even more comfortable for me than it is for most people? But, I detest it! It really felt as though I was being discouraged from just browing. I began to feel that I was expected to either buy something or get out. So, get out, I did. I went to wait in the car.
I heard yesterday on some public radio program that recent studies have shown that people really do not like this. So, I'm not the only one! In rating customer service, the artificial friendliness gets a business nowhere. I'm now looking forward to this becoming common knowledge, allowing me to shop in peace.
I detest artificial friendliness. This is where Russia really has it all over Americans. In Russia people do not paste false smiles onto their faces, or tell you to "have a nice day" again and again. I suppose you might say they err on the opposite end of the scale, taking even everyday exchanges - in stores or at a business, very seriously. I don't mind that at all, frankly. When the lady responsible for handling the dry-cleaning at the hotel is hyper-solemn and businesslike, it gives her (and her job) dignity. When the girl checking out at the grocery store, reprimands me for not bringing my own bags - well, she is right; I had been in Russia enough to know that I ought to carry a bag or two with me at all times. (And who can't appreciate that thriftiness and environmental benefit?)
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| You might not get a smile, but you get good bread. |
In Russia one of the things that I got used to, which initially surprised me, was what was I think the main job held by men - women seem to generally run the country, but in front of every business, it seems, there is a man. He just stands there and watches (and.smokes). A sort of guard? I never saw one accosting anyone, and they certainly did not seem to be there to help you. I presume the idea is to discourage shoplifters - though there was also one at the hotel, where there was nothing, really, to take. I did shock Ilya once, by asking one of these gentlemen for directions. I shocked the man, too. He truly looked dumbfounded, so perhaps the unspoken rule is that they are not to be addressed!
Here, though, it is a different story. In the front entry of far too many places there is someone who is actually placed there to watch for shoplifters, I'm told, but quite disingenuously, these people are called "greeters". And greet they do! They greet you with a bright "hello" as though they know you. As though they care about you. As though it delights them to see you. Since none of these things are true, perhaps there is some psychological ploy going on, intended to immediately put customers (oh, sorry - "guests") at a disadvantage. Because, no matter if you are deep in thought, or trying desperately to recall the seven things you want to be sure to buy (ticking them off in your mind so as not to forget), or you might even be so sad you are just struggling to keep from crying - despite whatever it is that is going on with you - enter the store and you must suddenly snap to attention yourself, and be artificially friendly back.
I hate it!
Part of that comes from having lived in a place where the effect that the big box stores are hoping to achieve (I think) was the genuine article. If you live in a small town, where everyone knows - or is, at least, acquainted with - everyone else, then these greetings are legitimate. When we were first married, we lived in a little town in Eastern Oregon - Heppner. Everyone in Heppner at least knew of everyone else.... Even if you didn't really know someone, you were all in the "same boat" so to speak. Living in that rural area gave you immediately a lot in common with everyone else. The town only had 1,500 people and it was an hour drive to anywhere bigger. When people were born, or when people died, a little notice was put on the counter in all the main businesses. People did matter. People were individuals. We had release time for religion classes, and if ever anyone noticed a little Catholic dilly-dallying by the creek rather than heading straight to the church for classes - I'd get a phone call! So, when the checker at the grocery store gave you a greeting it was the genuine article.
Maxim is working at Target now. I was early to pick him up one day, and figured I'd pleasantly wile away the time by browsing. I do enjoy browsing in Target.....but not that day! Every couple of minutes someone would ask me if they could "help" me - or assault me with one of those artificial "Hi! How are you?" non-questions. You can't really enjoy browsing if you have to keep stopping to speak to strangers. I just wonder what they think they are accomplishing. Comparitively, I am friendly and outgoing! I'm pretty comfortable talking to strangers after years of doing theatre and touring from city to city, sometimes even boarding with different people every night. Surely this stuff is even more comfortable for me than it is for most people? But, I detest it! It really felt as though I was being discouraged from just browing. I began to feel that I was expected to either buy something or get out. So, get out, I did. I went to wait in the car.
I heard yesterday on some public radio program that recent studies have shown that people really do not like this. So, I'm not the only one! In rating customer service, the artificial friendliness gets a business nowhere. I'm now looking forward to this becoming common knowledge, allowing me to shop in peace.
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